How to Live with a Host Family

Living with a host family abroad is one of the best ways to maximize your time in a new country. Nothing beats total language and cultural immersion! But there are challenges that come with moving into a stranger’s home, so having a heads up about how to live with a host family is always beneficial!

Looking for an authentic, immersive experience? A homestay is the way to go!

The number one thing to remember as you begin this process is to keep an open mind. This experience is meant to push you in ways you never thought possible. You wouldn’t be signing up to live with a host family if you wanted your life to stay exactly the same. Always keep your goals in mind!

What is it like living with a host family?

Every host family is different, so there’s no one experience that represents them all. But living with a host family is always an educational experience, and most of the time, students come back with a second family for life!

1. Your comfort zone will be pushed

Moving in with strangers in a different country is a guaranteed way to expand your boundaries. Try to view this as a positive thing and stay open-minded about the potential to grow. Being flexible and learning how to live with a host family will expose you to all types of amazing foods, music, local sites, and more!

2. Your language skills will become really strong (and very regional)

The best way to learn a language is to become totally immersed in it, so living with locals will surely give you a major leg up in your linguistic journey. But you’ll also hear lots of slang and regional expressions that aren’t used elsewhere.

It’s super important to know these terms so you can get around your host city, but it’s easy to fall into the trap of only learning the casual dialect instead of proper grammar. This is why it’s a good idea to take a language class while abroad!

3. There will be days when you’re either annoyed or on top of the world

Calling family and friends back home can help while living with a host family.

Living with anyone is never 100% smooth sailing, and staying with a host family is no different. There will be times when you get home from a long day of school to find your host sister blasting the “Dora the Explorer” theme song on repeat. But it won’t always be that nerve wrecking.

There will be other days when you have an awesome conversation with your host dad in French and understand every word he says. Life always has ups and downs regardless of where you’re living, so leave time for extra self-care on hard days and celebration on awesome days!

4. Don’t assume your host family will be a traditional “family”

One of the most misleading parts of study abroad is that a host family is called a host family. “Family” is a very loose term that may have once meant husband, wife, and children, but it doesn’t anymore.

You could be paired with any type of household including a single dad with young kids, a widow in her 70s who lives alone, or a gay couple in the process of adopting a child. Even if you are paired with a “traditional family”, they might practice a different religion and fast during the day. So, consider the full spectrum of your potential hosts before signing up. And always proceed with an open mind!

5. You might have very little in common

Along the same lines mentioned above, it’s always possible that you and your host family are total night-and-day opposites. Or, the rare fact hardly ever mentioned, the family hosts students just as a form of side income.

Many families have space for a live-in nanny, and when their children grow up, they rent out the nanny’s empty quarters to international students for extra money. So, you might actually be somewhat sequestered from the rest of the family, which means you’ll have to work a little harder to integrate yourself.

6. You’ll learn more than you ever thought possible

Cooking together is one of the best bonding experiences for a student and their host family!

There’s no better way to learn the true ins and outs of a culture and language than by living and breathing it every day. Even if you just think about the vocab you’ll learn by cooking or grocery shopping with locals, it’s astronomical compared to what you can learn in a classroom.

How to live with a host family

Luckily it's not very hard to stay with a host family. It only requires some planning ahead! Once you know that it’s your goal to live with a host family abroad, just follow the simple steps below to help guide your journey.

1. Apply for study abroad programs with homestay options

The first step to living with a host family abroad is to apply for study abroad programs that include this as an option. Be sure to check this carefully so you’re not limited after you’ve been accepted to a program.

Some programs split the housing choices between student housing and local homestays on a first-come, first-served basis. In these circumstances, check with your study abroad advisor on the likelihood of getting placed with a family.

READ MORE: How Long Should I Study Abroad?

2. Discuss with your advisor the process for matching students with families

Every study abroad program handles the matchmaking side of this differently, but there are some consistent standards you’ll most likely find. Be sure to talk with your study abroad advisor on what this process looks like. Programs usually take into consideration the following factors:

• Smoking: It’s not uncommon for host parents to smoke inside, especially those living in cities without outdoor access, so most programs let their students choose if they want to live in this type of environment or not. And likewise if you smoke, the family may choose to only host non-smokers.
• Internet access: Having WiFi might be a guaranteed thing at home, but in many countries, this is a luxury reserved for few. Some programs operating in these areas give a choice while other programs have very little control over guaranteed internet access.
• Private living space for the student: Families can host more than one international student at a time. It also varies by country and culture whether students get a private or shared space. Most programs take into consideration any preferences about this when matching families and students.
• Language skills: Study abroad programs don’t want to overwhelm students, so matches are often made based on mutual language skills between the family and international student. If you don’t speak a lick of Spanish and are headed to Spain, your program will most likely try to pair you with a family who can speak a little English. Your goal should still be immersion, but for safety purposes, language is usually considered.

3. Once assigned, introduce yourself and bring a gift!

Best go-to gift? A souvenir from your home country!

All relationships start out on the right foot with a proper introduction and thoughtful gift. If you’re given the host family’s email address or able to connect through social media, it’s smart to reach out before arrival to reduce any awkwardness.

Most host families sign up because they want to learn about new cultures. So, bringing a small gift from your home will go miles with your new family. The best idea is to bring something that you can do or enjoy together. This could be as simple as local pancake mix and maple syrup for a fun new brunch!

Talk to our FREE Online Advisor and get matched with homestay experiences

How to connect with your host family

It’s definitely a weird feeling to move into a stranger’s home and start ripping the awkward Band-Aids off. Everyone who lives with a host family feels uncomfortable at first—it’s normal! But connecting with your host family only takes a bit of effort and time.

Always remember that most study abroad tips vary by destination, culture, and language, but for the most part, people are people and it doesn’t take much to become friends.

1. Ask lots of questions

You’ll be living in a new home with people you’ve never met before…so don’t be afraid to speak up when you don’t know something or just to learn more about your new family. If you’re living with a retired couple, ask to see photos of their kids growing up.

If you don’t know what the heck a French press is, recruit your host sister to show you. Learning how to talk to your host family is the first big step in starting the relationship.

2. Find things you have in common

Ask your new family members about their favorite music, books, TV series, and movies. Most art and media has been translated and are available all over the world. It would be surprising if there’s no overlap between the shows you all watch and music you listen to.

The same goes for hobbies, sports, or other interests. Strike up a discussion and see where it goes! You’ll probably learn something about your host culture in the process of getting to know your new family.

3. Teach them about your home culture

Sharing your culture can teach you how to talk to your host family.

Don’t be afraid to open up and give details about your life. Let your host family get to know the real you! There’s this unspoken pressure when you first go abroad to immerse yourself completely and “forget” your home culture, but this can quickly lead to homesickness.

Embrace all the things that make you who you are and teach them to your host family! Sometimes this can even turn into funny situations, especially when you toss a language barrier into the mix. Try explaining what a cupcake is to your host family in a different language without laughing!

4. Don’t be offended by your host family just living their lives

It can be hard to feel like a cohesive unit if your host siblings are always off with their friends or your host parents travel for work most of the time. But always remember that while this might be an exciting time for you, it is probably life as usual for your host family.

There will still be all the stressors and excitement of life, regardless of you living with them. If there are any moments when you’re feeling left out or forgotten about, try not to take it personally, and talk about it with your host family if you feel comfortable doing so.

5. Always be honest with your host family

This is mostly about basic household respect, but it’s also relevant for your mental health. Everyone who studies abroad goes through some type of homesickness, and having people who you can open up to and support you helps tremendously.

The same goes for any physical health issues while abroad. It might be hard to tell your host mom that her cooking isn’t settling well, but it sure beats ending up in the hospital with inflamed intestines.

Staying with a host family will boost your education abroad experience!

Live with a host family! No matter what, you’ll learn and grow from the experience.

Regardless of the type of family you stay with, it will surely be an educational adventure and an experience that you treasure forever. Don’t stress over what it’s like living with a host family because every situation is truly unique. Rest assured that your decision to stay with a host family is definitely a beneficial one!

Explore ALL Study Abroad Programs on GoAbroad.com